Gratitude, Integrity, and Insurance

As my departure date nears (a mere 33 days away), I feel the need to reflect on two words--gratitude and integrity. Gratitude is something “new” I am trying, because let’s face it, I do have a lot to be thankful for. But this time I want to thank everyone who has supported me on this wild and crazy journey I have been talking about for the past several months. This ranges from some of my oldest and dearest friends, to my family, to strangers who work at Planet Organic, to my co-workers. I have been blown away by the support and encouragement that these people have given me. As I’ve already stated, I feel like a lot of people talk about these wonderful things they wanted to do in their life and as time goes on people realize just how few they’ve accomplished.

This leads into my second word, integrity. I feel like part of the reason I’m at comfortable with traveling is that I feel at peace about my reasons for going. Almost like my head and heart finally agree on something. For me integrity means living your own truth, and for me it feels like if I don’t do something to break the mold now, I’ll feel like I never can. So that is what I’m doing, taking a leap and hoping that the consequences of my actions, both the positive and negative, will ultimately leave me a better human being.

Ok, enough of my rambling. Here is the latest scoop on Operation Sunscreen. My already worried parents are discussing the possibility of getting kidnap insurance. Now overall, I certainly can see the benefits of having such insurance should I ever be kidnapped and they seek ransom. The disadvantage means that I have to map out ten months of my life in detail so the company can “assess” whether I am insurable. Admittedly, I don’t blame them. However, this did put me in an awkward situation that Sunday trying to map out a plan for ten months, when all I really had put in so far was “well I guess I should start at a Spanish Language School”. In a way, it was probably a great thing to have happen. I’ve been fairly lazy in the whole “planning” department. In part due to the idea that I really wanted Central America to, for lack of a better term, unveil itself to me in due time. This however doesn’t lead to a very insurable trip or to the sanity of my parents.

Try as I might, I still don’t really have a concrete plan. I have picked out all the farms that looked interesting to me, but now I’m trying to broaden the net. In particular seeking other places and organizations which might host volunteers for room and board. So far I’ve made my way through the Guatemalan guide book I received for Christmas (thanks Mom!) and am about a third of the way through the Nicaragua guidebook. Frankly it is both exciting and confusing. Part of my problem is that in a way, it all sounds really great. Surfing, kayaking, spelunking (fantastic word, by the way), volcano surfing, etc. In short, I feel like a kid in a candy store--overwhelmed, yet completely exhilarated by the number of options. What I keep thinking though is that at the end of the day, my entire plans could change by how I feel when I get there. Perhaps I find Antigua, Guatemala (my first planned stop) too touristy. Would I want to depart for Quetzaltenango instead? Or should I just spend my time on Lake Atitlan in the city of San Pedro La Laguna? Once I spend a couple months learning Spanish should I stay in Guatemala and work at a nearby farm close to Lake Atitlan? What if I don’t like the farm?

In many respects, I’m starting to realize how almost impossible it would be to sit down in my room in Calgary and try to figure out how I’ll feel about a place so far away. All I can do is remember how grateful I am to be able to take off ten months to travel and how at least if all else fails, I can at least cross something off my bucket list.

What am I getting myself into?

Today marks 46 days until I leave home to head for Central America, and I must confess that I am starting to get incredibly excited about it. I have talked about this trip since last November, so much so that my family and friends are probably sick of me talking about it. Or rather sick of trying to talk me out of it. I realize that my dream to travel through Central America one organic farm at a time may not exactly match what nearly anyone else would picture as a “super-fun-time”, but it is exactly where I want to be.

Why Central America and why organic farms? I’m not sure I could ever really sum it up in a blog why I feel so compelled to do this, but I can tell you there is no where else I would rather be. Perhaps it is an attempt to regain some of my spirit after completing a university degree. I don’t know about you, but I found the experience to be both exhilarating and completely soul crushing. Perhaps it was one too many group projects with inconsiderate people, but I am so relieved to be done and ready to move on with my life.

Now, I certainly do not regret a university education. And I count myself to be one of the very fortunate people in this world who have gained a basic education let alone university. I also feel fortunate that my experience with university taught me a lot about “what not to do”. In my case, it made me realize what kind of life I did not want to live. For instance, a nine-to-five working in a cubicle. And in fairness, perhaps no one does. One of the benefits of being young, and possibly naive, is that my life is a clean slate. I am at a point where I can create the life I want. And frankly, I want a life with more intrigue.

So capitalizing on the wealth of my good fortunes, I am going to put them to good use and expand my knowledge of the world at large. I have spent far too long feeling stifled by what someone else thought I should learn, what job I should have, or what kind of life I should be living. I am finally comfortable enough to know that we all need to be able to make these choices for ourselves. Even if it may seem selfish to leave my family and friends behind to go travel, in life we all need to be a little bit selfish sometimes. Perhaps not at the expense of others, but when it comes to the things you really want in life. In my case, this means living the life that I want. Hence from September to June, I will be traveling through Central America starting in Guatemala.

As much as I want this blog to be solely for my travels, it will likely become a speakers box too. After all, the Internet has made it possible for a nobody like me to tell the world what I think. And you best believe that I am going to use it to my full advantage.